This dealbreaker list is everything

baskauskas:

oh my god this guy messaged me on okcupid and he has a “don’t message me if” section and 

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jesus christ

This is amazing. 

awfulcupid:

You knew in advance that you shouldn’t have said it, and you said it anyway.

Good thinking.

This is romantic and I don’t understand how you possibly could have viewed his message as anything but true love. Definitely not rapey. Not at all.

Do you have a dating blog?

Let me know! Inbox me, answer here, whatever. I love following other online dating blogs + I’m down to do a little share for share goodtimes. Let’s all suffer together. 

A follow up from yesterday. He not only views women as objects, but he also can’t respect that no means no (when told twice). Wow, such catch. Many romance.

Feminism has ruined dating for me, you guys.

JK. I wouldn’t want it any other way, but seriously: thing? Argh. Ar’nt I a Woman?

Maybe I’m just extra salty tonight, but the hair comment struck me as odd for some reason. I don’t know, I’m probably just being hateful. 

But then that last message happened. Ew. EW. 

ETA:  He sent me several more one line messages after the above. So, I replied this then blocked him: 

What in the actual fuck? I keep getting messages almost identical to this one. Is there some pick up line article going around, telling men to lead with this bullshit? 

Also, yes. Yes, it does. 

Where to even begin? My questions are all about how liberal and non religious I am (pro-choice, pro gay rights, pro-science). His are like this. And talk about how everyone needs guns. Oh, and he says he doesn’t want to date anyone obese but messaged an obviously fat chick. Good times. 
But hey, his profile says he’s a genuinely nice person, so it must be true. 
Where to even begin? My questions are all about how liberal and non religious I am (pro-choice, pro gay rights, pro-science). His are like this. And talk about how everyone needs guns. Oh, and he says he doesn’t want to date anyone obese but messaged an obviously fat chick. Good times. 
But hey, his profile says he’s a genuinely nice person, so it must be true. 
Where to even begin? My questions are all about how liberal and non religious I am (pro-choice, pro gay rights, pro-science). His are like this. And talk about how everyone needs guns. Oh, and he says he doesn’t want to date anyone obese but messaged an obviously fat chick. Good times. 
But hey, his profile says he’s a genuinely nice person, so it must be true. 
Where to even begin? My questions are all about how liberal and non religious I am (pro-choice, pro gay rights, pro-science). His are like this. And talk about how everyone needs guns. Oh, and he says he doesn’t want to date anyone obese but messaged an obviously fat chick. Good times. 
But hey, his profile says he’s a genuinely nice person, so it must be true. 

Where to even begin? My questions are all about how liberal and non religious I am (pro-choice, pro gay rights, pro-science). His are like this. And talk about how everyone needs guns. Oh, and he says he doesn’t want to date anyone obese but messaged an obviously fat chick. Good times. 

But hey, his profile says he’s a genuinely nice person, so it must be true. 

Pros: proper grammar and curiosity, I guess?

Cons: IS HE GUNNA FORCE FEED ME SWEETS?!?! Or maybe, he’s an Edible Arrangements franchisee…? 

(Side note - I am no longer on OKC as a single lady…. I am listed as seeing someone, have nothing in my profile, and use it primarily to creep on the guys with whom my best friend is considering going out. I’m excited that I can now use this account for its true purpose, which is obviously to harvest creepy messages for your posting pleasure.) 

So you can like murder me? (I mean really, sure why not. But why is this the opener?)

upnu—- get it? GET IT? Up in you. Clever.

Ok. Not at all.